Posted by Mary on February 5, 2010
Today is National Wear Red Day. Thousands of Americans will be wearing red to draw attention to this startling fact:
Over 430,000 women die each year from cardiovascular disease – and most of these deaths are preventable.
I’m writing because I hope you’ll wear something red today to honor those women – I’ll be wearing RED in remembrance of my sister Faye who we called Susie, she died April 14th 2009 of cardiac arrest .
About every minute, another woman succumbs to cardiovascular disease. The American Heart Association is fighting back, and we need your help. Wear red today – and donate now to help save women’s lives Your donation could help keep someone you love safe from the #1 killer disease in the U.S. Thank you for your support today by participating in National Wear Red Day – and thank you for your support.
You are still missed Susie!
Mary
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Posted by Mary on February 3, 2010
On Friday, February 5, 2010, Americans nationwide will wear red to show their support for women’s heart disease awareness on National Wear Red Day®. This observance promotes the Red Dress symbol and provides an opportunity for everyone to unite in this life-saving awareness movement by showing off a favorite red dress, shirt, or tie, or Red Dress Pin.
Many of you know that I lost my sister unexpectedly last spring to cardiac arrest, my sister like many women did NOT have chest pain but she did have shortness of breath and some anxiety. Faye was very fond of the color RED and so I’m pleased to ask you to wear Red in honor of my sister and to raise awareness about women and heart disease. To learn more about how this disease impacts women I’ve included the following link http://www.goredforwomen.org/about_the_movement.aspx
I miss my sister every day and wish I could pick up my phone and call her to laugh about something I’ve seen or to go to a movie together. Take time to learn more about women and heart disease and pass on the information to the special women in your life!
Mary
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Posted by Mary on January 23, 2010
- Healing Paws
I had my second surgery last Monday on my left ankle and spent the night at Abbott Hospital. One of the things I noticed about being a patient was the fancy new paper gowns they have in pre-op that pumps warm air inside a paper balloon to keep your body warm, who would of thought - ”high tech disposable hospital gowns.” By the way they still open in the back, I wonder what that cost me? Since I have a high deductable medical plan I tend to be cautious about the plan of treatment and anything the doc orders because I pay for most of it.
Did you know it’s not easy to get a quote on the cost of care and procedures ahead of time, or at least some parts of the health care system seemed hesitant or unable to give me a quote on cost of surgery. My physcians office (Twin Cities Orthopedics) did the best job by calling me ahead of time, gave me the estimated cost of the surgeons time and offered me a 10% discount if I was willing to make a credit card payment. The representative was professional, organized, confidently answered my questions and immediately sent me a receipt by email and US mail; to be honest I was impressed.
That same day I received a call from Abbott Hospital to pre-register; I was asked if I wanted to help myself out by making a payment ahead of time. I asked what the cost would be and the representative told me she didn’t know so I asked if the hospital was offering me a discount for a payment up front and she said “no, she couldn’t do that.” I asked her what the benefit to me was to make a payment up front and she began to tell me about how lots of patients don’t pay and how the hospital has to try to collect… I stopped her to say I was just looking for the benefit to me that she mentioned. I asked again if she could give me an estimate or rough ball park quote and whether she would consider a discount if I made a payment, she said she could give me a number for the business office if I wanted to call and ask them about a discount. I told her about my experience earlier in the day with the physicians office and how that they gave me a quote and a discount if I payed early, she said she understood.
I eventually found a phone number that I could call at Abbott Hospital that gives you quotes and I spent a lot of time on the phone with a representative that seemed like she wanted to help me but it felt like the system used by the hospital makes it difficult, she did her best. At least she was helpful about reviewing simialr examples and items that impact the cost especially the “contracted rate” agreed to between my medical insurance company and the health care providers.
I have a few more stories to tell from the patients Eye View but at least for this posting my key insight is that since more people are having to pay out of pocket or at least like me have high deductibles it would be helpful if health care providers could “quickly” respond to a patients Request for Quote. Now that I pay for my care out of pocket I “pay attention” to the total cost of care and I don’t agree to everything the physician orders or at least we have a conversation about it. My key need is getting a quick quote quote so I know what or when to proceed with my medical care because in reality many people have to carefully choose what health care procedures they can afford.
Perhaps this is a “shame on me” for not being as diligent when my past employers and insurance companies had the majority of the fiscal responsibility so this has taught me that we are all responsible for questioning medical orders and the cost of care decisions no matter who is the primary payor.
As patients we need to be responsible team members in reviewing cost of care.
Mary
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Posted by Mary on January 17, 2010
Caregiving is still mostly a woman’s job and many women are putting their career and financial futures on hold as they juggle part-time caregiving and full-time job requirements. This is the reality reported in Caregiving in the U.S. 2009, the most comprehensive examination to date of caregiving in America. The first national profile of caregivers, Family Caregiving in the U.S. was published in 1997, and an updated version of the study, Caregiving in the U.S., was reported in 2004.
The sweeping 2009 study of the legions of people caring for younger adults, older adults, and children with special needs reveals that 29 percent of the U.S. adult population, or 65.7 million people, are caregivers, including 31 percent of all households. These caregivers provide an average of 20 hours of care per week. The 2009 reports also begin to trend the findings from all three waves of the study.
Key findings include:
- While caregivers and care recipients continue to be predominately female (66%), they are approximately three years older now than their counterparts were five years ago. Among caregivers age 18 and older, the average age of today’s caregiver is 49, and the average age of today’s care recipient is 69.
- Caregiving lasts an average of 4.6 years (including caregivers of children).
- Although there has been a decrease in the number of hours of care provided in an average week, a higher proportion of caregivers report helping their care recipient get into and out of beds and chairs, assisting with housework, and preparing meals. There is also an increase in the proportion of caregivers who say they need help or information.
- Caregivers say they have increased their use of supportive services, such as outside transportation services and respite services or sitters.
- Approximately three-fourths of caregivers work while caregiving. While this has remained consistent since 2004, there has been an increase in the proportion who say they have had to make a workplace accommodation because of caregiving.
- Although most caregivers say they experience little physical strain, emotional stress, or financial hardship as a result of being a caregiver, there are indications that caregiving is becoming more emotionally stressful for some and that some are experiencing more financial hardship fulfilling this role than five years ago.
An estimated 65.7 million Americans (29 percent of the U.S. adult population) are caregivers, providing unpaid care to a family member or friend for an average of 20 hours per week. This 2009 study provides updates and trends to surveys conducted in 1997 and 2004.
Article By: National Alliance for Caregiving in Collaboration with AARP; Funded by The MetLife Foundation | December 2009.
“I find it fasinating that many of us are Caregivers but we rarely identify ourselves as caregivers, as I read this article I found it hit the nail on the head and thus wanted to share with my audience of clients and friends. This information helps me realize why the work I do is so important. As I heal from my surgery this is my turn to be the person who needs care, I’m thankful I have loved ones available to provide the needed support but I realize not everyone is as lucky as I am.”
Mary
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Posted by Mary on January 13, 2010
2009 was a busy year and like you I’ve had both celebrations and painful losses to acknowledge but all in all I am grateful. I am blessed and I wish the same for you. This year I want to focus on a theme that one of my friends reminded me of and that is that I offer “peace of mind” to adult children and their aging parents. If you know of anyone who needs a helping hand with their senior family member I would love the opportunity to assist with medical care management, holistic healing & relaxation or end of life coordination.
Wishing you all a very happy and successful new year!
Mary
I’m very pleased to announce that Mary Chapa, RN, President of Eliza One, Inc. has fulfilled the requirements and added to her qualifications the title of CSA, Certified Senior Advisor. “I wanted to add another layer of expertise but I also liked the level of accountability, Code of Ethics and Professional Responsibility required when working with Seniors.” The society believes working with seniors requires both competance as well as a higher ethical standard and integrity.
Based on the demographics of our target client population 10,000 Americans turn 60 each day. This is one of the most profound demographic developments we have ever seen. The fastest-growing age group in the U.S. today is 85 and older based on 2004 census data.
For additional information on the Society and why it’s important to work with professionals that have this certification please follow this link: http://www.society-csa.com/default.aspx
Celebrating Caregivers and Families: Contributing Author Mary Chapa Announces the Release of “Priceless Caregiving: Stories of Elder Care Success, Courage and Strength”
Mary Chapa RN, President, author and elder care expert announces the release of the new book “Priceless Caregiving: Stories of Elder Care Success, Courage and Strength.” Mary is a contributing author in one of the most uplifting books to be written all year. Now released in paperback, Priceless Caregiving can be ordered through Amazon.com or by contacting her office locally.
Minneapolis Women’s ExpoJanuary 29 – 31, 2010 held at the Mpls. Convention Center http://www.mplswomensexpo.com/mpls/
Since I will be recovering from surgery I will not personally be at the event however my friend Rebecca Janke will have my book Priceless Caregiving available for sale at her booth Growing Communities for Peace. In addition I am sending bags from Women Heart that will include information on Women and Heart Disease, many of you know I lost my sister last spring unexpectedly from Cardiac Arrest and I want to honor her memory by sharing information with other women. http://www.womenheart.org/
I also want to announce that February 5th is National Wear Red Day, Heart disease is the No. 1 Killer of women..
GO RED FOR WOMEN and for my sister Faye, RED was her favorite color!
“No medicine is more valuable, none more efficacious, none better suited to the cure of all our temporal ills than a friend to whom we may turn for consolation in time of trouble, and with whom we may share our happiness in time of joy.” Saint Alfred of Rievaulx
A special thank you to all my family and friends who have sent their healing energy to me in person or through notes, calls, gifts or prayers during my healing – I love you all!
Mary
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Posted by Mary on January 6, 2010
Healing is hard work, it may not seem so but it is. I’ve been home bound as I wait for my broken ankle to heal and for me the hard part is learning to be patient. You’ll understand my disappointment when I say I got a call from my doctor this week to tell me the new x-ray shows the bones are misaligned and she is recommending another surgery, gosh just when I was feeling like I was closing in on the finish line.
Recommended Reading
It’s hard not to feel sorry for myself but when I think of how others manage more serious grief I know there are things worse than sitting at home with my leg up on a pillow. I recall the pain and grief earlier this year when we lost my sister unexpectedly and I struggled to find a way to organize the closing of her affairs through my pain of loss. That was when I met my friend Kat Reed who shared my experiences of loss and frustration at the lack of resources to help organize our loved one’s affairs.
We discussed how we created lists and spread sheets for all the action items that needed to be done and I was thrilled to find Kat went a lot farther than I did, she decided to write a book so others would have the benefit of her work. Kat and I talked about how her book would help provide a template for others and with the work I do supporting adult children and their aging parents there might be ways we can partner to speak to interested groups and organizations about loss and how to put one foot in front of the other at end of life.
I was absolutely delighted to see that that the Pioneer Press did an article about Kat and the release of her book which I is a gift to those that are facing a loss and don’t know where to start; it’s also a tremendous resource for those of us working with clients and families at end of life. Many of us ask and wonder how we can help our family and friends during a time of grief and I think Kat’s book gives us some real actionable items and a better understanding of the work involved during a difficult time.
I am pleased to recommend the book “Begin Here, Helping Survivors Manage” by my friend Kat Reed. I’m including the link to the article in Sunday’s paper and a link to Kat’s website if you are interested in purchasing her book.
http://www.twincities.com/ci_14103540?IADID=Search-www.twincities.com-www.twincities.com
www.HelpingSurvivorsManage.com
As I sit here with my leg up on pillows and contemplate starting over again with another surgery I say a prayer of thanks to my sisters and dear friends who have supported me with the gift of friendship during this tiny detour in my road to healing. They remind me that I am not alone, I am blessed and I have a brand new year to celebrate.
Wishing you all a Happy New Year!
Mary
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Posted by Mary on December 19, 2009
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Taking time to heal these past few weeks has been a gift; I’ve realized how many caring family and friends I have. I’m grateful for all those that have continued to take time these past five weeks (yes it’s been five weeks already) to call, send notes, bring food and gifts or just stop by to visit during this very busy time of year. I’m grateful for the real gift of true compassion, generous and compassionate family and friends.
I took time this week to send Christmas cards and I wanted to write a special note to those that are facing a loss for the first time. I remember last year facing the holidays without my father and this year instead of feeling like we got past that first year without Dad we are facing our first year without my sister Susie. I’m thinking of my sister in laws who are also facing the holidays with a significant loss this year; my sister in law Judy lost her father last month and my sister in law Sandy lost another sister to Breast Cancer. Both these families like mine will sit at the table or around the holiday tree with loved ones this year and feel the loss of a loved one.
It seems like little consolation to say I know how you feel so I look for my own ways to celebrate life and as I’ve told family and friends I work hard at “choosing happiness.” I believe we have a choice at some point in our grieving process to begin the journey back from sadness to joy, easier said than done but I believe that’s what my Dad and sister would want for me.
I seek creative ways to remember my loved ones though shared stories, pictures, memories, ritual and laughter. I recently had an opportunity to contribute a story about my Dad for a recent publication and I am thrilled to say it was accepted, now I look for more ways to share meaningful memories with others. My hope for all of you is to find a way to remember your missing loved ones through shared stories and hopefully you will be able to find your way back to joy and laughter again.
Warm Holiday Wishes
Mary
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Posted by Mary on December 1, 2009
This Friday will be three weeks since I had emergency surgery in Puerto Vallarta to repair a compound fracture of my left ankle. I’m home recouperating now and this week I will re-visit my Orthopedic surgeon again, I’m hoping the sutures will be removed and a more rigid cast applied so I can drastically improve my ability to get around. Right now I’m limited to my family room, unfortunately my “good” leg has a torn meniscus so until I learn to levitate I’m really challenged.
If you received my newsletter you know I am willing to share some of my experiences about travel and healthcare.
- All my medical documents are in Spanish and in order to file a claim with my insurance company they need to be translated by a “certified” agency; I have a quote of $775.00 to translate all documents including several pages of the itemized hospital bill.
- The Travel Insurance will expect me/you to file a claim with your own personal insurance company “first” and be denied before they will review and decide on your claim for reimbursement.
- When you are traveling and if you should need medical attention you will need cash and you will need to be able to pay for your care using one or more credit cards, insurance reimbursement is your responsibility so be sure to retain all your records and receipts.
- Hopefully you have called your own insurance company before you leave the country to inquire about your coverage and policy limits.
- When traveling it is always important to notify your credit card company. If you need medical care and it’s expensive you will most likely need to use your credit cards to cover the cost of your care.
- Keep in mind if you need care outside the US you are most likely using providers that are “Out of Network” which means your coverage definitions vary so be sure to ask questions, your deductable might be twice what you thought it was (mine is).
- When you are ill or in need of care I strongly recommend you have an advocate or witness to be with you because you may not be able to focus or remember everything if you are uncomfortable, stressed or in pain.
- Fear, Anger and frustration will not help your healing process when you are hospitalized nor will it help you gain support as you work through the bureaacratic financial or insurance claims requirements.
- As you begin to make the phone calls for both follow up care and starting the claims process be patient and kind, ask questions so people can and will help you through the process.
Take a deep breath and focus on the real priority and that means healing and getting well, take time to rest, eat well and just let others help you whether it’s bringing a meal or just stopping by to cheer you. Take a day at a time and believe that there are hidden blessings in this life event. I’ve always been the big sister, the boss, the one in charge of coordinating eveything and making decisions, this time my loved ones are in charge and I’m in their very capable hands. Truely something to be Thankful for.
Blessings,
Mary
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Posted by Mary on November 25, 2009
We arrived home from our little vacation in Mexico on Sunday November 15th but the trip wasn’t quite what we had planned and as they say “life is what happens when you are busy making plans.” During our lovely stay in Sayulita Mexico I fell and severely fractured my left ankle. After having surgery in a Mexican Hospital I returned home and as my friend Starr mentioned being handicapped is indeed a humbling experience and I have to agree. As I managed my emotions and limitations the past few days I realized for me there has to be a grieving process to acknowledge my loss of independence.
Some of the things I’ve experienced:
* I’m aware of what is handicap accessible and what is not when traveling
* Airport travel for the handicapped could really use some Quality Improvement
* I notice that people rarely pay attention to people in wheelchairs it’s like being invisible
* Getting in and out of cars is challenging and the use of Medi-Vans can be very costly
* Being limited to one room on the main level of my home is almost suffocating
* I miss sleeping in my own bed, it’s on another level of the house
* I am unable to drive of course and driving is a true symbol of independence
* Getting ready in the morning and taking a shower becomes a major activity
* I’m not able to work which compromises finances
* All my medical documentation is in Spanish and needs translation for insurance claims
* Feeling out of the loop; you become very aware of who has compassion and who stays connected
The most important thing I’ve learned these past few days is that I’m responsible for managing my healing, my own happiness but Compassion is always in style. In my next posting I will share more of my experiences with Travel, Insurance and medical care, what has worked for me and what was a total surprise.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Mary
I’d like to recommend Lakes Medi-Van, Inc. serving MN, their toll free number is (800) 422 – 0976 our driver Lars made my first experience a very pleasant one - Thanks Lars!
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Posted by Mary on October 20, 2009
Whenever I visit with my senior friend I learn something new. Recently we were discussing getting refills on medications and as we were talking I realized how something so simple becomes so challenging for seniors. Does your pharmacy use automated voice prompts? Is your family member hard of hearing, do they use a hearing aid? These hurtles can be so challenging it can prevent your loved one from getting their prescriptions filled.
I know my own family members would rather drive to the pharmacy to drop off their empty prescription bottles and ask the pharmacist questions in person. But what if your family member is no longer driving? I find many seniors don’t want to be a burden to their family and friends so they may not ask for your help, you will need to take time to listen and anticipate their needs – offer to help them run errands.
The challenge of getting medications refilled impacts the health of your senior loved one. So what about mail order, that seems like a perfect answer to the problem and it might be but keep in mind the usual amount of pills sent will be a 90 day supply. My father was grateful to be on a mail order refill plan through the Veteran’s Hospital but as his medications would change he would have large amounts of excess pills, ointments, creams or dressings and unfortunately we could not send them back.
When I sit with clients and review their ability to manage their medications at home I listen carefully and I always learn something. Next time you’re with your senior parent review the pharmacy labels, are the expiration dates current, when was the last time they were filled, is the medication still medically necessary and does it work or are the side effects bothersome? To make sure the medications are set up correctly and that they are taken regularly you might consider using some of the weekly medication containers or reminders. Use your pharmacist as a resource; you might be surprised what you learn?
If you would like help in supporting your aging parent or senior family member please feel free to call me for assistance.
Mary
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